so, i had to rewrite this draft. i had started it on sunday night and literally got up in the middle of writing it and ran my dog to the vet--he had a stroke and was paralyzed from about midway down his back down(just like in people, any healthy living creature can have a stroke at any time). since the vet said that he was never going to be able to use his rear half again, we decided to put him down. it's a terrble decision to make, but i would've *honestly* rather i have died than to see my good boy suffer.
i was sort of embarrassed by how it's entirely possible to suffer excruciating loss over a house pet. i've had my dog for my entire adult life and considered him like a child, and while the pain is easing a little since we've put his toys in the garage and stuff, i'm still a bit sick to my stomach and sleeping hasnt been easy. getting readjusted to jogging alone, coming home to no german shepherd hurling himself at me, and quite frankly, rediscovering all the extra floor space has been very difficult. mentally reminding myself of these things has been even worse.
on the upside, i have never, in my life, been so touched by how the people closest to me would empathize with how heartbroken i am. it's been mind-blowing. i've been wishing i was a more eloquent woman so that i can express how grateful i am, but i'm just not able to say how much it's meant to me. i'm seriously so blessed to have this kind of support system.
and here're just some photos, because my micki really was the best dog ever.
rest in peace, pumpkin.***
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